The Big Boy Bed

For some parents, a toddler climbing out of the crib is the sign for transitioning from crib to big kid bed. Sometimes the transition comes hand-in-hand with potty training. Others may have had to transition, not from a crib, but from cosleeping in the parents' bed. And I'm (wildly) guessing that in a few cases, it's the child that asks for a big kid bed.

Whatever the reason, the transition is necessary at some point. Timing varies for everyone, depending on circumstances and child and whether the parents are brave enough.

Lucky for us, Matthew had never attempted to climb out of his crib. We're still in the (loooong) process of potty-training but that isn't a consideration for us since Matthew is in a pull-up at naptime and a night-time pull up at night. He's in underwear the rest of the day though. And at his current language processing level, he would ask for ice cream (he says "I want ice cream please) but it is unlikely that he would ask for a big boy bed. He likes his brush teeth-read books-sleep in crib routine.

Like many parents, we had many questions before the transition.
Is he ready to be out of his crib?
Will he transition well?
Should he go to a toddler bed or twin?
Should we take his toys out of his room? And books?
How much are we spending on a new twin bed, mattress protector, and sheets? What if he gets up in the middle of the night and wanders out of his room? What if he wanders into Elizabeth's room and wakes her? Or downstairs? Or outside?

The Big Boy Bed
After much deliberation and making phone calls for quotes on twin beds, we finally decided to transition him to a full bed. We moved the full bed from our guest room to his room. We have an extra queen mattress that will go into the guest room.

The big boy bed was extremely well received. Both kids were very excited. Initially, all the jumping, playing, and rolling on it make it seem like it wasn't going to work. Was Matthew going to be playing all night on his new bed? Oh boy!

Since transitioning on Sunday, he has taken 2 naps and had a good night's sleep on his big boy bed without incident. So it's looking like we won't need to buy a new twin bed, saving us at least $250. We just needed an extra mattress protector and extra sheets. His new big boy bed is on the floor with no safety rails. If he rolls off, it's only a 7 to 8-inch drop. The box spring and bed frame will be added on when he's older.

The toys and books stayed in his room.

Safety Considerations
We have a Summer Infant Best View Handheld color monitor set-up in Matthew's room. We like to be able to see how and what he's doing in his room.

To address the issue of potentially wandering, we installed a door knob safety cover on his door to prevent him (or at least slow him down) from opening it from inside his room. It may not be the best solution but it works at this time and it is temporary until we find something better. A door knob safety cover is also on Elizabeth's door so he can't open her door. A third door knob safety cover is on the inside of the front door.

We're also considering installing an extra lock out of his reach on the front door and the door leading to the garage.

The gate on the stairs is not easy for him to move. But it's not impossible. He's still not totally steady walking down the stairs. Maybe a bell on the gate at night will help as an additional "alarm system" that would probably have less chance of waking Elizabeth.

I still remember sleepless nights when Matthew was an infant. As a first-time mom with him, I learned to sleep with my ears on alert for every cry that needed my attention. Having him in a big boy bed certainly adds new meaning to "sleepless, restless nights".

The Preschool Adjustment Period

Matthew's been in school for exactly a month now. He started on November 8. The first day was generally fine but he cried on and off for the first 2 weeks. The protesting would start as soon as I pulled into the school parking lot.



It was a big adjustment for him. There were so many new things to get used to - new people, new smells, new routine, new place, new rules, and new expectations - without me next to him for a few hours, 4 mornings a week. That's a lot for this 3-year old. On top of making this big transition, the preschool germs got to him a week after school. He (and Elizabeth and I) have been battling a cold since week 2 of preschool. It was expected since he had never been constantly been exposed to other kids before and we're right in the middle of flu season.

During this adjustment period, I took photos of his school, him in the classroom, some of his classmates, his backpack, his teacher, him exiting the school gate, and a picture of Elizabeth and I waiting for him. Showing him the photos daily and talking about school with 2 to 3-word phrases for each photo seemed to help a little. I'm sure his positive experiences at school helped too. The group activities seemed to be the most overwhelming for him so during the first two weeks, they eased him into the group activities one baby step at a time. At times, they would pull him out of class for one-on-one speech therapy as he did really well with that. Over time, he was crying less and transitions between activities got better.





These days, when I tell him that it's time to go to school, he says "A-ca" with a smile, referring to his speech & language therapist, Monica, who was also his speech therapist when he was in the Early Intervention program. Then he says "kack-kack" (backpack). We put his shoes and jacket on and Elizabeth in the car seat and we're off to school! Calm. Happy. Motivated.

I got to see how he did in school one day when their class had a Thanksgiving party. He was excited to see Elizabeth and I there. With guidance, he eagerly participated in the activities they had lined up for the kids. He was distracted with me there but I saw how comfortable he was to be in his class, doing the activities alongside his classmates.



Looks like he enjoys preschool!

Book Review: From Emotions to Advocacy, 2nd ed

An invaluable reference for parents who have children with special needs! It's so easy to read and easy to navigate. The book talks to me, at my level of understanding. I'm new to the IEP (Individualized Education Program) process and the special education scene. Matthew transitions out of the Early Intervention (EI) program next week when he turns 3.

Judge this book by its cover! It truly is a Special Education Survival Guide. The authors, Pam Wright and Pete Wright, offer vital information on everything about special needs education and practical suggestions for many typical scenarios from preparing for the IEP to resolving conflicts. It's very comprehensive.

The book is divided into five well-organized sections. Section 1 helps parents to organize their thoughts and ideas in advocating for their child. Section 2 has chapters on learning the rules of the game, common traps and obstacles, tips for conflict resolution and crisis management. Section 3 includes information about evaluations, various tests and measurements, file organization and a wonderful how-to chapter on writing SMART (Specific, Measurable, Action Words, Realistic and Relevant, Time-Limited) IEP goals. Section 4 is packed with the nitty gritty of Special Education Law. Section 5 discusses tactics and strategies to manage and win disputes, including the best ways to document information.

I found the chapters in section 3 and the chapter on creating a paper trail in section 5 most helpful in preparing me for our first IEP meeting.

Just browsing through the content of the rest of the book, I have a feeling this will be my "bible" in advocating for Matthew's education.

Have you read it? What do you think?

Transition Meeting

Transitioning from the Early Intervention (EI) program to the Early Childhood Special Education (ECSE) can be an overwhelming experience for a first-timer like myself. But I found ways to make the process less daunting. We had the 6-month IFSP review last week and the transition meeting yesterday. In our state and our school district, the transition meeting was scheduled separately from the final 6-month IFSP review. Overall, both meetings went very well.

Preparing for the Transition Meeting
1. Attend workshops - I attended workshops such as "Your First IEP" at the 2010 Down Syndrome Conference and "Next Steps" at the local Disability Fair. These workshops gave me a chance to listen and talk to other parents about their experiences with the transition process. I picked up great information and tips at these workshops. It was at one of these workshops that I learned about a good resource called "Transition from Early Intervention". There are also helpful workshops such as "IDEA Part C to B" and "Understanding the IEP Process", both of which I was not able to attend.

2. Prepare a Developmental Achievement Chart - This document lists Matthew's can-do's and things he needed to work on in all areas of development (communication skills, fine motor skills, gross motor skills, self-care/ independent skills, social skills & self-concept, cognitive skills, senses & perception). I typed it up on Microsoft Word, patterned after the downloadable .pdf file is available on the MPACT (Missouri Parents Act) website's resource page. I highly recommend preparing this (or similar document) for the school representative(s) at the transition meeting. I met with three school reps, gave them a copy of this document and they were impressed and grateful to have such specific detail about Matthew's current development. While this document highlights Matthew's many strengths, it also emphasizes the fact that he has developmental delays and still needs help. Hence, he would still need certain therapy services.

3. Prepare a list of questions - I listed all my questions on a sheet of paper. At the transition meeting, I checked off questions as they were answered. My questions were:
- How and when will it be determined what services Matthew is eligible for?
- What does the evaluation process entail?
- Where will the evaluation take place?
- When will the evaluation be? Can we schedule separate evaluations?
- What type of testing may be done? What assessment tool will be used?
- Can a family member be present during the evaluation?
- After the evaluation, when will the results be available? Will I get my own copy?
- Is the Reading of the Evaluation Results scheduled separately from the evaluation day and IEP meeting?
- Are there "typically developing" kids placed in the class at any time during the week?
- Will Matthew be pulled out of the classroom for all types of therapies? Are some therapies pushed in the classroom?
- Are therapies group or individual?
- How can parents communicate with the teacher and therapists? How often?
- What supplies will Matthew need?
- Will the school need hearing and vision information from Matthew's doctors? How current must they be?
- What other information will the school need about Matthew?
- How will teachers and therapists communicate with Matthew, assuming he's still not saying understandable words when he's in the program? Will assistive technology devices be used?
- How will Matthew's classroom placement be determined?
- How many students are there in a class?
- Are there field trips parents can participate in?
- Who can I call if I have more questions?

4. Start a binder - To file everything from communication logs between the school and myself, copies of IEP's (Individualized Education Plan), evaluations, rights and procedural safeguards, and other information pertaining to Matthew's education.

Other helpful tips I picked up from the workshops but didn't apply in our situation were:
1. Visit the early childhood centers or preschools to get a good idea of which one you want your child to attend. - We don't have a spread of choices for special education in our area but the few parents that I had spoken to about our local ECSE program had only good things to say about it. So I didn't feel the need to visit the school or look around prior to the meetings.

2. Explore the necessity of Senate bill 112 - This is for children who turn 3 mid-school year. Matthew turns 3 close to the beginning of the school year so it is not necessary in our case.

The Meeting
Our EI service coordinator, three school representatives, and Matthew's speech therapist, who also works at the school, were present at the meeting. Matthew's other therapists offered to be at the transition meeting but I didn't think it was necessary. I would, however, want them present at our First IEP meeting, which will be scheduled close to Matthew's birthday.

During the meeting, we went over the evaluation process and how services can be center-based or provided at the preschool, daycare, and/or at home. That decision will be made at the IEP meeting. Our preference would be to have Matthew receive services in the preschool setting so that he also gets the benefits of socializing with other kids in his class. Each class usually has a maximum of 12 children, sometimes a few more toward the end of the schoolyear. Each class has "typically developing" kids to serve as role models. I forgot to ask how many there were per class and if they were there during the whole school week, which is every morning for 4 days in the week.

Some therapy services are pushed in the classroom, which means the therapist will work with Matthew in the classroom as they are participating in the class activities. Some therapy services are done in a group and some are individual, depending on factors such as Matthew's needs, effectiveness, and if we choose to specify one way or another in his IEP.

I can expect to receive quarterly progress notes from the teacher and therapists. At the same time, I can contact them anytime if I have questions or concerns. Some parents communicate with the school via a notebook on a regular (maybe weekly) basis if needed. I personally think that a notebook or email would be a good way to communicate with the school so I can have everything in writing.

Since Matthew's current speech therapist in the EI program also works at the school, she will be assigned to Matthew when he is in school. This should make for a seamless transition in speech therapy for Matthew and one less adjustment to make.

The classrooms are packed with toys and activities to stimulate any child's imagination and make learning a lot of fun. As soon as we walked into one of the classrooms, Matthew immediately started investigating the different toys and activity areas. There is a separate area for speech therapy if a child needs to be pulled out of the classroom for it. And there is a separate room for physical therapy (PT) and occupational therapy (OT). The PT and OT room had a trampoline, a swing, climbing equipment and other fun stuff.

From what I gathered at the meeting, everyone seems to be excited about having Matthew there. It was pretty funny and cute to hear about how everyone wanted to work with Matthew and they were going to have to fight over him or draw straws. Some of the teachers/ therapists hadn't met him yet or had only briefly met him. Maybe it was his charming, sweet smile that drew them in. Maybe it's because of all the good things his speech therapist has said about him. Whatever it is, it makes me smile.

What's Next?
The school will contact us in August or September to schedule an individual evaluation. This may be done in several sessions, depending on how many areas of development they will need to assess and depending on how well Matthew puts up with the process. If the diagnosticians/ evaluators get enough information about Matthew's development from updated EI progress notes in August and other information I provide them with, they may not have to evaluate him in some areas of development.

I will write about our experience with the evaluation process once we have gone through it. Stay tuned!


Related posts:
Preparing for the Final 6-month IFSP Review